Pompous Hearts Insufferable Mondays

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Is there anything more satisfying than curling up on the couch on Sunday morning with a steaming mug of cocoa and mocking the chuckleheads who cropped up that day on The New York Times Weddings pages? No, of course there is not. Now, your typical Times couple gets in and gets out without too much fuss. Hit the Ivy affiliations, throw in that dad was a senator and mom spent the 80s photographing indigenous South Seas peoples, bingo bango, you’re done. But at least one couple comes through and delivers the goods. Every Monday, we’ll snicker at them.

First up, the couple that shares the following heartwarming tale about how they met when she was a waitress at our own fair city’s Politiki bar and he would come in to watch Steelers games. “I was trying not to be the typical bar guy, drunk, watching football and begging for her number,” says the groom. His blushing bride counters, “He was just a wimp.” Oh those crazy kids. Their grandchildren are going to want to take that clipping out and read it again and again. “Granny, tell us again about the time Grandpa said that you slung a plate of jalepeno cheesy poppers better than any barmaid he’d ever seen and then you questioned his manhood and then you had them print that story in the newspaper that broke the Pentagon Papers.”

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4 Responses to “Pompous Hearts Insufferable Mondays”

  1. I-66 Says:

    [snicker]

    He left out the part about how he’d drunkenly grope her as she pranced by. She left out the part about how he did it better than any other bar patron that week. Oh, and that she liked it.

  2. jess Says:

    a friend of mine used to work on the wedding pages for the times. she said it was the most miserable job of her life, as crazy entitled women would call her and say that ‘do you know who i am?!’ kinda thing to get her to print their announcements. she had to explain she was just an intern….

    this made me giggle. 🙂

  3. E :) Says:

    OMG! Congrats Brunch, I mean Bridal Bird. Yay!

  4. Herb Says:

    Love it! I usually read those announcments slack jawed at the outrageous pomposity of it all!

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