Another Piece of Cake? Yes, Please!

Ooh, Churchy Magoo the Korean-Ogling Fat Caliper isn’t going to like this one…

Finally, a jewelery company that recognizes that the second my fiancé says “I do,” I have no intention of ever caring about what I eat again. That that’s all she wrote on working out. This would be the new “Memory Fit” wedding band from Bailey Banks & Biddle.

The ad copy:

Memory Fit is a revolutionary sizing mechanism on the inside of the ring that allows the ring to comfortably increase a full finger size.

One wonders how strenuous the conference table debate was before they decided to excise:

Because let’s be honest. Maybe you’ll make it back after the first kid, but once the second one arrives? Eh, not so much. Not having kids? Well those honeymoon pounds don’t really matter when he’s contractually obligated to stay with you anyway, right?


10 Responses to “Another Piece of Cake? Yes, Please!”

  1. K Says:

    This reminds me of one of my favorite sorority jokes evah:

    Did you hear about the new Sorority Girl Barbie? Yeah, when you put a ring on her finger, her hips expand!

    I can’t believe this is from BB&B and not, say, Zales.

  2. Phil Says:


    I’m going to start calling my sweatpants “Memory Pants”.

  3. P Says:

    Finally we see a realistic approach!

  4. I-66 Says:

    Oh come on, like this concept doesn’t have Jared written all over it. They could even get Subway dude to appear in the commercials. Yeah, he lost the weight, but that’s all the more reason to put him in there.

    “Just because the ring can expand, doesn’t mean you have to.”

  5. Marissa Says:

    But wait, so I can only get moderately obese? One size? What if I want to get morbidly obese? Then what?!

  6. Lemmonex Says:

    I would suggest this ring to my (fictional) fiance just to see the look on his face.

  7. etcetera Says:

    i assume memory fit is available for men’s wedding bands too, right? using data i gathered at my college reunion last year, i would say there is a significant market for such a thing among the huskier sex.

  8. Mort Says:

    Yeah… um… why make a ring that can expand, when you can just as easily get your husband to keep buying you new rings as your size changes?

    Come on ladies!

  9. Shannon Says:

    Marissa, if you want to get morbidly obese, you get the wedding ring made out of Spandex. Duh.

  10. RCR Says:

    Men already buy their ring a size bigger anyway. It’s not an if, but when. That is, when your nagging gets so bad that I’m up to a case of beer and and 2 bags of Funyuns a day, the gap in that extra size will close quite quickly.

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